@TonyTheTigersSon
2020 has been one of the most, if not the most tremulous ever for families. Any plans you had for the year have gone out the window. When you add kids in the mix it that can complicate things even more. As a dad you will have a lot to balance between home and family. Here are 3 main things you can do to be Quarantined Dad Champion:
1.Plan everything
Do not underestimate the power of a plan. Now I know that with kids nothing goes as planned, but it is plan is what reduces the level of unpredictability. Write down and map out what your day. Do this for everyone, mom included. this allows you to know what everyone should be doing at what time. Place it somewhere which is visible to everyone can see it. Use the plan as a guide and not a doctrine. If things are not going to plan don’t worry, just guide the family back on track. which I know easier said than done.
As for you, do not just wake and jump on your laptop. Define your work hours and make sure to re-enforce it to your family. After a while, they will know when is your work time. Do not allow you to work time to bleed into your family time. Begin and end work as you have planned. Whether you are working from home or going out to work, during this time, work can take more time than it uses to. Plan your time.
Schedule decompression time
With everything that is going on, it can be a lot to take in. You are probably working earlier and logging off later than you usually do. You are balancing child care and work at the same time. If your spouse has a job that requires her to go back to work this could mean you are at home alone with the kids. The news is highlighting rising COVID infections and there are protests happening in your city. Yikes! The worst thing to do when taking in all of these things is to not have an outlet.
Small destressers are now gone, for example, that 30 minutes to an hour commute where you would listen to your podcast or music is now gone. The Friday night hangout with your buddies is now gone. Your favorite sport is not even on TV anymore. This is why you need to schedule some decompression time, some time to recharge, and align your bearings. Find 30 minutes to an hour to do what you need to do to relax. If you know in the day time that is not possible, then schedule something early in the morning or late at night. Do what you need to do from burning out.
Remember Wifey Time
Due to kids, work and global pandemic, you can forget that you have a partner in this parenting thing. Being a good husband or partner is a larger percentage of being a good dad. That relationship needs attention too. While cleaning the house, feeding the kids and finishing that report, when would you find the time to show affection ot you spouse. Well, after you have decompressed , schedule some time to spend with wifey. It does not have to be a long time, catch a movie, lay in bed or take a drive ( after you found some one to watch the kids).
Do not allow this time to deteriorate your partnership. Communicate with your partner, Understand that love is a choice you must make every day, not a feeling that will happen upon you for the rest of your life. When this pandemic is over you still want to have your normal life. Just as your kids need attention so does your partner.
For many fathers, first-generation or otherwise, having a family means that they need to make self-improvement and embracing of self-care. Remember your family looks to you to help with guiding them through this time. Relax because you are doing great.
